Jokes

[niemeyjt]

@mysty where did you get that gem from

As this is the jokes thread, I guess the same place as he gets his snowman jokes.

@mysty - if you are practicing for this year's Christmas cracker inserts, how shall I put it, don't give up the day job just yet!

[niemeyjt]

pino.jpg

[mysty]

Never seen the joke section so busy, looked okay on the phone.

[mysty]

Boris to save the NHS.
If you were in the brownies or scouts and got your first aid badge you can now be a doctor, nurse or surgeon without completing the training, just like new HGV divers.

@mysty where did you get that gem from

Like the snowmen ones it's all in the head.

Ats read on twitter that if you played surgeon as a child you could now work for the NHS.
I just dumbed it down a bit.

[Pathca]

I think it’s probably a misinterpretation of the Telegraph report that nearly 50% of NHS staff don’t have medical qualifications,and people have been asking for a shake up

[niemeyjt]

I think it’s probably a misinterpretation of the Telegraph report that nearly 50% of NHS staff don’t have medical qualifications,and people have been asking for a shake up

If they want a shake-up surely they need a cocktail waiter?

(Off topic - how many of us have a degree relevant to our work / are working in the same area as their degree subject? On the first day one of the Professors said over 90% of us would not be working in the subject five years after graduation and I am in that 90%).

[Spardo]

I think it’s probably a misinterpretation of the Telegraph report that nearly 50% of NHS staff don’t have medical qualifications,and people have been asking for a shake up

If they want a shake-up surely they need a cocktail waiter?

(Off topic - how many of us have a degree relevant to our work / are working in the same area as their degree subject? On the first day one of the Professors said over 90% of us would not be working in the subject five years after graduation and I am in that 90%).

Certainly not degreeless me who was told that I had to leave at 16 as a condition to entering Merchant Navy Officers' college, only to find out at a later school re-union that a friend had gone through to uni, got his degree in whatever it was, and then happened to wandering on the docks somewhere in the NE and became engaged in conversation with a passing sea captain who offered him a job on the spot as a cadet, which later developed into a career as a 2nd mate.

He didn't become a captain because he got married, his wife wanted him ashore, and he finally retired as a police inspector.

I felt so cheated, I could have had such fun at university.

[Doug]

I'm the fourth of six siblings the only one to get to uni was my youngest brother. I left school at 14, started working for a living, left home at 16.
My uni has been the university of life and its done me well.

[Veem]

Does no-one know any jokes then ...............

[Char]

Does no-one know any jokes then ...............

Thread drift, don't you just love it.

A man tells his doctor, “Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!”

The doctor replies, “Sorry, I don’t follow you …”