Jokes

:speech_balloon: Grab a chair, kick off your shoes, chill and chat.
Post Reply
Message
Author
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1481 Post by niemeyjt »

Swiss bankers are becoming an endangered species.

Having worked with both UBS and now defunct Credit Suisse I can only say I am not surprised.
Top
User avatar
Blaze
Posts: 5404
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 9:06 pm
Location: Ille et Villaine (35)

Jokes

#1482 Post by Blaze »

382987098_1536381086893258_8263553935494828221_n.jpg
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1483 Post by niemeyjt »

They used to say, if it moves and isn't supposed to you need duct tape.

If it doesn't move and is supposed to you need WD40.

Yes, I am sad, I do have both in the car. WD40 in a Joke Thread . . .

wd40.png
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1484 Post by niemeyjt »

Mrs N was sorting out her wardrobe the other day. Excitedly, she exclaimed "Look - it still fits me after 30 years"

I said "It's a scarf".
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1485 Post by niemeyjt »

Mrs N says I still push all her buttons after 30 years.

I don't believe it - if I did I would have found the "mute" button by now.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1486 Post by niemeyjt »

Police chasing a dangerous criminal through Heathrow Airport lost him at the Helsinki check-in desk . . . they claim he disappeared into Finnair.
Top
User avatar
Blaze
Posts: 5404
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 9:06 pm
Location: Ille et Villaine (35)

Jokes

#1487 Post by Blaze »

383221598_331474872737369_145878356373875832_n.jpg
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1488 Post by niemeyjt »

I've just joined the local gym. I asked my person trainer which machine he recommended first for me to maximise my chances of attracting beautiful women.

He said the ATM outside.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1489 Post by niemeyjt »

Our local priest taught his parrot to recite the Lord's Prayer.

Now it's a bird of pray.
Top
niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

Jokes

#1490 Post by niemeyjt »

I am keen to recycle - so I keep all my dead batteries in a box on my desk.

Anyone who wants them can have them - they're free of charge.
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Chatterbox”