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:speech_balloon: Grab a chair, kick off your shoes, chill and chat.
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A.N.Other
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#2771 Post by A.N.Other »

Victor was 4 years old and was staying with his grandfather for a few days.
He'd been playing outside with the other kids, when he came into the house and asked,
'Grandpa, what's that called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one is on top of the other?'
His Grandpa was a little taken aback, but he decided to tell him the truth.
'Well, Victor, it's called sexual intercourse.'
'Oh,' Little Vic said, 'OK,' and went back outside to play with the other kids.
A few minutes later he came back in and said angrily, 'Grandpa, it isn't called sexual intercourse.

It's called Bunk Beds, and Jimmy's mum wants to talk to you!'

A.N.Other
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#2772 Post by A.N.Other »

Paddy is 85 and lives in a Senior Citizens Home. Every night after dinner he goes to a secluded garden behind the home to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life. One evening, Mary, age 82, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed.

After a short lull in their conversation, Paddy turns to Mary and asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?"

She asks, "What?''

"Sex." he replies.

Mary exclaims, "Why you old toot. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!"

"I know," says Paddy, "but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while."

"Well, I can oblige," says Mary, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it.

Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mary would hold Paddy's thingie.

Then one night Paddy didn't show up at their usual meeting place.

Alarmed, Mary decided to find him and make sure he was O.K.

She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Paddy's's little pal!

Furious, Mary yelled, "You two-timing son-of-a-gun!! What does Ethel have that I don't have?"



Old Paddy smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's"

ajm
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#2773 Post by ajm »

If Trump is allowed to pick the next Pope he will not apply any tariffs to Italian goods. Wouldn't put it past him. You heard it here first. :angel:

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Bayleaf
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#2774 Post by Bayleaf »

Just as well that's in the joke section! :lol:

Moving on ...
cross ant.jpg
8-)
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Bayleaf
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#2775 Post by Bayleaf »

matt cyber attack.jpg
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Biloute
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#2776 Post by Biloute »

trump pape.jpg
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Demain est le premier des jours qu'il nous reste à vivre: profitons-en ! :D

Polarengineer
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#2777 Post by Polarengineer »

wrong finger

ajm
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#2778 Post by ajm »

Disgraceful!!

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Bayleaf
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#2779 Post by Bayleaf »

Yep. I'm an atheist, and even I'm offended by this image! Somebody please make it stop ......! ;)

Speaking of atheists, this came up as an old but gold humour sketch. The brilliant Dave Allen - my late mum's favourite comedian, despite her being "a believer", so she said! I'm not sure this humour would be accepted today, but I found it hilarious! :lol:

Lori
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#2780 Post by Lori »

Very funny Bayleaf ! I loved it.

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