Jokes

:speech_balloon: Grab a chair, kick off your shoes, chill and chat.
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Loup-garou
Posts: 603
Joined: Tue Jul 27, 2021 4:41 pm
Location: 52 & 71

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#2241 Post by Loup-garou »

Yes but you didn't see some of my dates! I often took a hammer and wooden stake with me - plus all the dogs and my mother! :o
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Sparkle
Posts: 2010
Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2021 3:01 pm
Location: 53 Mayenne

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#2242 Post by Sparkle »

oooh I'm loving all of these latest jokes and so do my friends but I have to make a note cos I forget most of them by the time I get to the bar so I've starting writing down the punch line as a reminder :lol:
With this hand, I will lift your sorrows. Your cup will never be empty, for I will be your wine. With this candle, I will light your way into darkness. With this ring, I ask you to be mine.........The Corpse Bride
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niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

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#2243 Post by niemeyjt »

Loup-garou wrote: ↑Tue Aug 06, 2024 12:09 pmYes but you didn't see some of my dates! I often took a hammer and wooden stake with me - plus all the dogs and my mother! :o
Ah yes - the old stake dinner.
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niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

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#2244 Post by niemeyjt »

Talking of dates, I once had the real hots for a girl who worked in a soft drinks factory.

Sadly she only wanted a cordial relationship.
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niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

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#2245 Post by niemeyjt »

Talking of exes, I broke up with one after five years when I finally discovered she was a communist.

I don't know why it took me so long to realize, there were red flags everywhere.
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niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

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#2246 Post by niemeyjt »

It turned out another was really a ghost.

I had my suspicions when she walked through the door.
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Bayleaf
Posts: 3382
Joined: Thu Sep 02, 2021 7:22 am
Location: NE Dordogne

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#2247 Post by Bayleaf »

:lol:
best man.jpg
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A.N.Other
Posts: 323
Joined: Thu Sep 23, 2021 7:02 pm

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#2248 Post by A.N.Other »

An insult to piglets IMO
Trump piglet.JPG
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niemeyjt
Posts: 4920
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2021 6:34 pm

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#2249 Post by niemeyjt »

The Apple store in Stockport was looted during the riots and the thieves got away with £200K of stock.

They stole 2 iPhones.
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michael86
Posts: 46
Joined: Fri Jul 30, 2021 12:49 pm
Location: Vienne 86 and England

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#2250 Post by michael86 »

I got a compliment on my driving today. I drove into town to do some shopping. When I got back to the car there was a note on the windscreen which said "parking fine".
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